The 25th reason you can’t find love is because you don’t understand the opposite sex. We are told so many lies about the opposite sex when we are children. We are told that the girls are innocent and made of sugar, spices and everything good. Boys are made of puppy tails and dirt. Then they grow up and get to know each other without knowing how to interact. Both men and women end up using a one-size-fits-all approach.
For one thing, I have lived in several countries with English speakers and non-English speakers. What I saw were human beings. Healthy women had uteruses and could have a baby. Men had sexual organs to fertilize women. While living in those places, I noticed that the men were stronger than the women, they all ate, slept, went to the bathroom and drank fluids. At some point, everyone got angry, sad, happy, frustrated, etc. And all healthy humans go through the experience of learning to walk, talk, eat, receive education and use it in our daily lives.
I say all this to say that there are many generalizations that are shared by all healthy humans. Both men and women are human and share many common experiences.
However, in the US, many women see men as watchdogs and ATM machines. They have a more diplomatic way of saying it. They say a man’s role is to provide and protect. You don’t have to be human to do that. That’s where women miss out on the true value that men can bring.
Women are taught that men are simple, want one thing, and think with smaller heads. They are told that women are smarter and more mature than men. However, all the world’s civilizations and industries have been created by men. How smart do you have to be to start from scratch and go from planning, financing, educating and employing people to building cities, towns, commerce and entertainment? Everything is done to make women’s lives safer and easier. Except the women pretend like the men didn’t do anything. All this points to the fact that women do not understand men.
At the same time, men are in for a rude awakening when they find out that women are not innocent. They have equally desirable thoughts about sex as men. Society tells him to hide it. They also find that women cheat. It’s not just the men. In fact, the difference between cheating wives is not much smaller than cheating husbands. As a result, many men go from believing that all women are innocent to that women are gold diggers in a nanosecond. This disillusionment makes communication between the sexes very difficult. It doesn’t help when women are told there is a battle of the sexes and they must compete against men.
Women are not taught how to communicate with men. Men are expected to “just know” what a woman wants. That makes a lot of men take one look and say “yes, darling.”
Perhaps one of the biggest differences in the way men and women are raised is that children are taught the clear consequences of any behavior. The girls are not. When they grow up, it becomes apparent. You see that when you ask men what they are responsible for in relationships. As a rule, men can answer with a long list. When women are asked the same question, they talk about home and children. None of it is directly for the man. At most, the woman will talk about food and sex is what she provides the man. Those things are mutual. Other than that, she isn’t aware of what a man needs. The problem is that there are no consequences for her. At most, her man cheats. She stays because she can hold that over her head.
Ultimately, people are not taught to treat each other as human beings. Each of us is individually responsible for making the relationship work. In the 21st century, making a relationship work means that the man is responsible. If you doubt me, listen to the slogan, happy wife, happy life. It is the man’s responsibility to make his wife happy. That is if he himself wants to be happy.
As you see, this is only the result of education. We improperly educate boys and girls about the opposite sex. If we prepare them properly, it will be easier for men and women to come together.
