We live in a world that is exposed to constant terror. A few days ago an individual was arrested at JFK airport. The flight he disembarked from was AL-LIE 2006 from the Far-Far East. When he checked in at the customs counter, immigration officials noticed the unusual excitement of one of the travelers. After a thorough search, the suspicion was confirmed. The subject, who posed as a university professor of basic sciences, was in possession of suspicious and dangerous items. The customs official reported that he was in possession of an eraser, a ruler, a protractor, a caliper, a bottle of milk and a peculiar coded book of non-Anglo-Saxon origin on units and algorithms: “The 2006 Edition – SI Units , Conversion and Measurement Skills”. Keywords: “unit conversion”, “experimental science”, “measure if”, “English to metric”, “fun tests”, “uncertainty”, “power of ten” and “the da Vinci code”. also very suspicious…
Evidently, the man violated recently imposed flight regulations. He was immediately taken to an undisclosed Central European interrogation camp.
Thanks to recently approved interrogation methods, officers quickly learned that the man was a member of the infamous Al-Gebra movement. He was charged with carrying weapons of mathematical instruction. Al-Gebra has been discovered to be a section of a fearsome extremist scientific cult whose goal is to constantly increase the knowledge of numbers with the sole intention of conquering the world. They use secret names like “X” and “Y” and refer to themselves as “Unknown”. What threatens the world is that in different countries, “Unknowns” change the names of their units to: fps, imperial, cgs, mks, KGB, si, ichi-foot, metric, tuzin-kopa and other strange names that make them difficult . follow up. However, it has been determined that they belong to a common illuminati denominator with coordinates in all countries on earth since time immemorial…
Commenting on the event, President Bush assured the American public that no foreign units (even French) would be allowed into the US. Citizens were warned not to make any contact with them. The result of the immediate survey showed that 90% of the population reacted positively to the appeal.
In his defense, the individual muttered that he had been framed by his own daughter who had planted a bottle of milk in his luggage as an expression of her love. He admitted that he had flown in from the Far East to help American science teachers. He confessed that, despite recent Nobel prizes, he was very concerned about the quality of US science textbooks. He was also concerned that, according to “Trumpet” magazine, the percentage of American students planning to earn engineering degrees had dropped from 36% to 6% over the past decade. The final straw that prompted him to board the plane was a statement from his beloved Oprah, who mentioned on primetime television that high school students in the US had placed 24th in international math tests. . She denied that the book she was carrying was a set of instructions but rather a unique book on experimental science. He said the book was stimulating and entertaining in nature and just what American students needed. He maintained that Amazon had already been selling the book for some time at an exorbitant price, out of the reach of the average American student and without the permission of the author.
(This strange message was passed to IIPCAG for investigation). His intention was to find an honest American publisher and sell the book for ten times less. Then he started a strange chant: “u-uk yu-usa, do n’t-de-lay, metri-cate!”
The officers came to the conclusion that although the terrorist had been deprived of a lawyer and a doctor, he should rather be admitted for psychiatric observation…
