Women like to snuggle with their lover right after sex. Men are typically, wham bam, thank you ma’am.
A man will cuddle up after sex if he is deeply in love. In the years when everyone smoked, it was typical to immediately smoke a cigarette after a sexual fight. There was this joke, Doctor to lady patient, “Do you smoke after sex?” Patient: “You know, doctor, I’ve never looked.”
This isn’t a perfect test, but if your man is jumping around, perhaps going to the bathroom, and then off to other activities, you should be curious, unless you’ve been married or together for a long time. If there is little foreplay and he has sex just to satisfy himself, he is either very insensitive or not very in love.
He immediately notices her at the new job. He is a member of T&A and she has T and a beautiful A. She catches him watching. Hmmm, so that’s the new type. Do you like my truth? Maybe I’ll take it home.
A cocktail party later they are in bed together and from then on the office feels delicate, sometimes at noon and of course everyone knows it. Soon you’re having dinners for the couple and cocktails after work with the gang, as a couple, and he humps and crashes at every opportunity.
The girls then want to know if he already asked her and she mentions marriage, but he wants to move out or for her to move out. OK, we do it for a while and things are going perfectly. Whoops, miss her period. It’s both of their fault. Too anxious too many times and no pill or condom. Right here is the critical point. It’s time to face reality. Will they still be hot for each other every day in their forties?
Or maybe there is no pregnancy but one is pushing to get married and the other relents and agrees.
If you have persistent doubts. If you still have a wandering eye. If you start poking at little things that used to be fine. If there are some fuss after a big night when you both feel down. These are clues. Listen to that little angel on your shoulder whispering doubts in your ear.
We know a good man. A very nice man. His now wife was not married at forty and probably would have married a tree. He was too nice to say no and she was so anxious that she pushed him down the aisle. Guess what? They have been married for many years and seem quietly content.
The difference is that they weren’t so young and in heat when they got married. So the moral of that story is that it can work and love can grow, but if it’s based on passion and heat, the chance it will work is only forty percent.
Marriage is difficult. New in-laws. How to raise a child. She stays at home, money is tight. All the friends are gone and finding married friends is not that easy. Married friends compare marriages, then talk on the phone bothering the spouse. He has a group of girls working with him and he comes home a little drunk. She begins to smell her shirts and go through her drawers. Her mother helps her daughter mess with him.
When they drive, he turns his head to watch the younger chicks. She catches him watching porn. Right here stop! She go sit down and talk it over. Try new sexual positions. She must know that all men take a look at young girls and if she’s being honest, she’s taken a look at some tight asses herself. Tell your mom to fire him. You don’t need that.
Next week we will explore having had a great lover and now you love a poor lover. Should you get married? Should you teach him and risk him knowing about your past? Should you hire one of these women who have sex with him, teach him? Sure there are sex surrogates. Internet porn, will that help? New sexual positions? You must do it right or you will be thinking about that old lover too often.
