There are four types of daters. Do you know which one you are? Would you like to have more dates?
People give many reasons why they can’t find anyone to date. Here are some recent ones I’ve heard:
“I can’t meet anyone to date in church. Everyone in my church is old”. (Maybe those old people would introduce you to their unmarried children or grandchildren if you approached them).
“There’s no one to go out with in this town.” (Are you in a ghost town? How about spreading out to a neighboring town?)
“I’m too fat to date.” (If you can get out of the house, you can go out. And if you can’t get out of the house, your date can come visit you.)
“All the good ones are gone.” (How could they be? You’re still here.)
Dating can’t happen if you believe any of the above phrases. These are the reasons people give themselves to get stuck. If you can find multiple people saying the same thing, these reasons sound like the LAW. These are the obstacles we put in our way.
Daters fall into four categories:
1. Quote “cautious and clueless”
Some daters are cautious and clueless. Cautious is another way of saying that you are afraid. Clueless means you have no idea how to get a date. It’s easy for you to embrace all the negative beliefs within yourself and from the rest of the world that say, “You’ll never find anyone to date, and if you did, you wouldn’t like them anyway.” There are a million reasons why there is no point in dating or trying to meet someone and fall in love. Do not believe them. If you listen to them, you will remain…Cautious, clueless and stuck.
2. DATE “…IF ONLY”
Aspiring daters often use these words. When you hear yourself say, “If only,” you’re really saying that it’s never going to happen. “If only I had put him first.” “If only I were younger (taller, thinner, more handsome, richer, whatever).” This date never budges, never gets what he wants, and never pursues anything with all his heart with self-imposed responsibility. If only they could get out of his own way, change his defeatist attitude and open his eyes to all the opportunities that exist.
3. “SOME DAYS” DATES
These daters are the people who “one day” are going to sail around the world, learn a new language, or write their life story. If you’re a person who uses this phrase frequently, you may never date. You may want to be with someone, but not enough to put yourself out there and learn how to date. And maybe you will, someday. Do your “someday” today.
4. “WILL TO TRY” QUOTE
This dater is the person who is willing to learn from others, ask questions, and take action. They are the people you can count on at work to keep their word, do a good job, and solve the problem. If you are a person who is willing to put in a lot of effort, you will be good at dating. If you show up and socialize, over and over again, you will succeed. It may not happen as quickly as you’d like, but it will.
If you recognize yourself in any of the first three dating categories, just know that you don’t have to get stuck there. You have the ability to change your mind, your actions and your future. There may be four types of daters, but you belong to the “willing to try” type of person. Then you’ll be in a category of your own: “A Successful Dater!”
