Balancing motherhood with your career and love life can be a difficult juggling act to master. With all the demands you face from kids, work, and your partner, you may have a hard time keeping your sanity. Being a mother is one of the toughest jobs in the world and no amount of organizational skills can change that. There are a few ways that you can improve your own emotional state along with the functioning of your home, career, and relationships.
Keeping your balls in the air
• Make a schedule. Make a weekly schedule to allocate time for laundry, cooking, housework, and any other regular chores. Keep the schedule in a place where you can see it every day and try to stick to it. Be sure to leave space every day for downtime or scheduling lapses.
• Make time for romance. Whether you’re in the dating scene or happily married, make time for that special someone. Prepare a candlelight dinner, rent a romantic movie, or try something new in the bedroom, even if you think you’re too tired.
• Get help. If your parents or neighbors offer to help you with the children, don’t be ashamed to accept them. You’d be amazed at what a difference it can make when Grandma takes turns picking up her son from soccer practice once a month.
• Keep children busy. Don’t feel guilty about giving them daily chores. Even if you are able to do everything yourself, give them age-appropriate responsibilities, such as emptying the dishwasher or taking kitchen trash to the trash. You will not only lighten your load, but also build your children’s character.
The first is the first
• Give yourself a special treat. Putting yourself first may seem like a ridiculous proposition for a single mother who is caring for three children and has a busy career. However, putting your happiness first is an important part of being the best mother, worker, and person you can be. Remember, we generally tend to project the state of mind we are in, so if you are happy, the people around you will feel that happiness too. Go pedicures while the kids are at their grandparents’ house. You deserve it.
• Enjoy a weekly date night. Being married doesn’t mean you have to be boring. Get a babysitter and go out with your partner once a week for a romantic dinner. If you’re in the dating scene, go out with your boyfriend or spend a night at the movies alone.
• Make time for girls’ day. Every now and then, try meeting up with your girlfriends for a spa day or a night of cocktails and gossip. Spending time with other women can be therapeutic and a lot of fun.
• Put your partner to work. Don’t be a bummer, but talk to him beforehand that he needs more help around the house. Maybe you could take the kids outside to play while you cook dinner. Or could you vacuum the house while you take the girls to the ballet on Saturday?
The key to managing a house full of kids, a budding career, and a fulfilling relationship lies in finding balance. You can enjoy your life and put yourself first without neglecting your family, job, or partner. Motherhood is a difficult but rewarding journey that requires tough skin, a soft heart, and a sense of humor. Above all, don’t feel guilty about taking care of yourself once in a while.
2011 Moira G Gallaga ©
